[Accidental Video]
Sep. 7th, 2010 07:05 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
maddest[No staircases for Break.
He somehow goes ass over teakettle out of his open window, where he'd been sitting on the sill, landing in the soft garden outside with a rather surprised yell. The PCD in particular tumbles out of his hands, and lands in the grass, while Break lies on his back, blinking in shock.
That was unexpected.]
Really.
Really.
He somehow goes ass over teakettle out of his open window, where he'd been sitting on the sill, landing in the soft garden outside with a rather surprised yell. The PCD in particular tumbles out of his hands, and lands in the grass, while Break lies on his back, blinking in shock.
That was unexpected.]
Really.
Really.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2010-09-08 07:25 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-09-08 07:26 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-09-08 07:28 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-09-08 07:30 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-09-08 07:31 am (UTC)How is your condition?
no subject
Date: 2010-09-08 07:32 am (UTC)What's his name?
no subject
Date: 2010-09-08 07:33 am (UTC)How quickly?
no subject
Date: 2010-09-08 07:35 am (UTC)Why did you say that, about the dissection?
no subject
Date: 2010-09-08 07:38 am (UTC)How long do you think you have?
no subject
Date: 2010-09-08 07:39 am (UTC)It could also, I realize, be rotting my mind, which could take me sooner.
What makes him different from you?
no subject
Date: 2010-09-08 07:43 am (UTC)Let me replace your lungs, and we'll see how your brain fares?
no subject
Date: 2010-09-08 07:44 am (UTC)Tell me how you killed him?
no subject
Date: 2010-09-08 07:49 am (UTC)It was both, don't be picky. What would change that intention?
no subject
Date: 2010-09-08 07:51 am (UTC)The recipe calls for one part forgiveness, two parts desperation, a pinch of insanity and a larger portion of masochism than I currently possess.
no subject
Date: 2010-09-08 07:55 am (UTC)If you're afraid of pain, I can give you something for it this time, if it helps?
no subject
Date: 2010-09-08 07:57 am (UTC)-all right. I can't keep track of the back and forth. Let me explain this as clearly as I can, elaborate if I need to, then you can tell me the whole story, all right? I think we've been skirting this issue for a while.
[And he always feels this close to making him get it.]
no subject
Date: 2010-09-08 07:58 am (UTC)...And alright, go ahead.
no subject
Date: 2010-09-08 08:02 am (UTC)I know you believe you had good reason, but those are your values and do not reflect my own. I do not, and never will believe that what you did to me was acceptable because it was in the name of experimentation. I value my bodily autonomy far more highly than I do your experiments. The fact that you had to subdue me physically to get me to participate makes me think you knew I would, too.
Following so far?
no subject
Date: 2010-09-08 08:05 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-09-08 08:08 am (UTC)First of all, there's the fact that you broke the rules of this code of conduct. The consequences are that you're pegged, henceforth, as a potentially dangerous and ultimately unpredictable entity. Your unpredictability makes you all the more dangerous.
Second of all, there's the anger. You caused me tremendous physical pain, and put me in a position where I was helpless and afraid. All of those things translate very easily to an anger response, which in turn leads to spite. Fundamentally, I do not want to let you have this, even if it would be ultimately painless for me, which it would not be.
You are untrustworthy, and unlikeable.
no subject
Date: 2010-09-08 08:14 am (UTC)On an emotional level though, it doesn't resonate at all.]
Why would I put your rules of conduct before my own? I can see why you'd prefer to follow yours, and even that you'd expect me to do the same - but not why I should, as a default, care about your opinions.
And I don't see what's untrustworthy about anything I did. I never lied to get you to visit me. [That was Yuca's job.]
no subject
Date: 2010-09-08 08:23 am (UTC)A good example is the way Yuca was treated after his angels got loose. The social norm is that no one sets plagues of angels loose on everyone, Yuca violated that norm, and people that had considered themselves his friend rejected him. He violated the rules of that social contract.
You permitted Yuca to deceive me into coming there, stabbed me, and operated on me explicitly without my consent. You have done nothing to prove that you would not do it again.
no subject
Date: 2010-09-08 08:33 am (UTC)And yes, I know all of that nonsense exists, but why should it matter to me? I've never paid attention to it - I wouldn't have my current position if it mattered. Even if it had mattered, I don't see why I would change.
My science is the important thing. It's not something that can be compromised over. The rules of some ignorant, uneducated, majority don't supersede my own.
And of course I permitted him. It's not my fault you wouldn't have agreed if Yuca had told you exactly what was going on. And if you gave consent now, then you wouldn't have to worry about being operated on without it, if it's so important to you.
no subject
Date: 2010-09-08 08:42 am (UTC)Importance is a value judgement, and essentially meaningless. You value science, other people value personal safety. There's a conflict, leave it at that. The problem occurs when your values conflict with other peoples so violently. You treated me as an experiment, a means to your science, and in turn I will treat you as a threat to what I value, to my personal autonomy. It doesn't make either of us right; right and wrongness are social constructs, or personal constructs in your case, since you're in a society of one. But it affects the way we interact with one another.
The issue now is that your violation of my social code has made you the sort of person I am unlikely to give consent to in the future. It proved that you do not respect my boundaries. Why would I consent to put myself at the mercy of someone who I know does not? We could work out some kind of collateral, I suppose, or supervision for you to guarantee that you didn't take things too far again. But that wouldn't undo how angry I am with you, so I don't have much reason to try.
no subject
Date: 2010-09-08 08:51 am (UTC)So you refuse my experiments just because you're angry? ...I suppose the better question is when you'll decide to get over it. Your consent is just as meaningless as society's; it's a convenience and nothing else.
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